this is what heterophobia would look like if it was real. if you believe that heterophobia is a real thing that exists, please watch this because you will see that it simply doesn’t exist, that it never has and never will.
tbh I think everyone should watch this anyway because it’s very clever and very powerful
fun fact: Michael Cera asked Rihanna if he could slap her ass for real and she said “you can slap my ass for real if I can slap you in the face for real” and he was like alright. and they did the take like 3 times and Michael was like “you’re not hitting me hard enough do it for real” and then she slapped the fuck out of him and threw off his equilibrium so much he had to go lay down in his trailer for like half an hour lmao and that’s the take they used in the movie with no added sound effects
this movie wasn’t the best but it had the best michael cera role for sure
THE RETURN OF GRANDPA IRON LUNGS
WAKE AND BAKE EDITION
Gotta get ready for Christmas
this is going to be me when im old
how is he not dead
the dance after the hit
I just reblogged an article about unpaid internships and I have some stuff to say as an unpaid intern who couldn’t even find any kind of work for almost two months.
In order to get an (unpaid) internship, you need to have had other (unpaid) internships because they don’t care about assignments you handed in for class and unless your blog(s) went viral, none of your writing counts as being published. Nothing you do for school even counts, unless you were involved in actual publications and have clips to send out. There are other aspects of journalism, writing, editing, research and whatever else than writing articles. Anyone who knows me will tell you that I was super involved in stuff and that I’m all about social media, but I didn’t get a response from places I’d probably do really well at, like buzzfeed and some radio station I don’t remember the name of. Those actually might have been paid, but I’m still qualified as shit and never got a response.
But unpaid internships are the stupidest fucking thing. Or even low paying jobs that require skills. I’m currently at one and doing additional unpaid work for someone else, but the latter only makes more sense because it’s supposed to end in a salaried position and I’m really clinging onto that hope because my other option seems to be PR and I find that unfulfilling. Also, it’s a daily reminder of how much I hate capitalism. I could do it for a few months because the company I intern for is cool, but I don’t find talking things/people up to be better than they are to try to convince people to pay money for them would leave me fulfilled in the least. I want to do something for the betterment of this repulsive society. Since I don’t believe that I can contribute to changing the society as a whole, as we’ve hit the point of no return, I want to help it in a minor way. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not aiming to work for a nonprofit or some shit like that, but devoting my life to PR would actually contribute to the decay. (God, I hope that other unpaid gig pulls through or there goes my PR option.) My contribution could be something like bringing awareness to the repugnance of society or, like, comedic relief or something. Enlightening people or making them laugh is honorable.
The thing about unpaid or low paid work is that the only way to get through it is with hope and optimism about the future. Same with college, but whatever. You have to use your education and skill, even strain and challenge yourself (which some people aren’t into - and I wouldn’t be either if it’s doing something I hate) for absolutely nothing. (Which would be all fine and good if we didn’t live in a capitalist society but I’m not saying we should (or could) smash capitalism.) You have to do this for nothing when you could be working across the street at in-n-out for apparently $10.25 an hour (as they posted on their door). Where you would (I assume) get a free meal when you work and get paid for doing…nothing, pretty much. I mean flipping hamburgers and operating a cash register is a joke…it’s just mentally straining to use your brain that little.
So what’s the appeal? For a lot of people, it’s the the pride of both making a lot of money and not working at what our society tells us is a bottom-of-the-barrel kinda job. For others, it’s the honor and fulfillment of bettering society. And while we can all recognize how customer service is absolutely necessary and all of the people who do it are heroes in their own little way, no one actually wants to do that kind of work.
Those jobs aren’t that easy to get either. I had a couple of weeks of desperation during which I sent out resumes (and even cover letters) to coffee shops. I wouldn’t stoop low enough to work at subway again, but coffee shops have a nice environment. I applied to at least 15 cafes and guess how many I heard back from? (0). Urban outfitters was hiring too, so I applied to work there. They emailed back - denied. I felt entitled to at least be picky with customer service jobs I applied for - I have two fucking degrees and a minor from a top university that I earned in three years and the coffee bean won’t even email me back. Ironically, chipotle emailed me back during this time in response to an application I completed during September 2011 - also denied. Maybe If I email them back telling them about my new degrees, they’ll change their mind?? I gave up on that hunt when I scored some unpaid shit though.
To the people who “privilege-shamed” me both through college because my parents helped me pay for it and through my job hunt for not working at pizza hut until I could support myself enough to try again or go to grad school, can we not? I am extremely grateful that my parents are both successful and supportive enough to have helped me, and I’m not at all apologetic about it (only to my parents for realizing too late how unnecessary undergraduate private education is and for half assing high school and not getting any scholarships - sorry, guys). I hope that you will be able to do the same for your kids (without having to raise them to not eat when they go out to Applebees with their friends and sticking to sales and the dollar menu - anyone who knows me can tell you that my family are not big spenders (read: we’re cheapskates)). If I did just go work at a customer service job, what would that do for me? While I’d be making minimum wage (woo hoo, living the dream!!), once I quit to put a legitimate effort into a second job hunt, I would be back at square one - no experience and even less of an excuse because what have I been doing over the past year? Working at…pizza hut? What a resume fluffer, amirite?
So I’m pissed and I’m unpaid and a lot of the time I want to drive 120 mph off of a bridge or stand at the edge of a cliff and watch the world burn and then jump, but what can ya do besides float in a pool of cheap vodka until someone fishes you out and offers you a salary. “Do it yourself, you can do anything!!” I’ll get back to you when I have a fan-base on the internet…people UNfollow me when I tweet (please follow me, I’m desperate for attention).
The Exploited Laborers of the Liberal Media: Interns
Editor’s note: For years, VICE has used part-time unpaid interns—a practice that we recently halted. Our current policy is to pay interns $10 an hour and limit them to 20 hours a week during the school year and 25 hours a week during the summer.
I was 21 years old when I took out my earring, combed my hair, and tried concealing my distaste for power and Washington, DC, in order to ask questions at press conferences. It was the summer of 2006, and I had just left college to go work for a small, do-gooding nonprofit that covered Capitol Hill for public radio.
I went through the whole experience of being a journalist in the nation’s capital: attending deadly boring policy luncheons, interviewing near-dead lawmakers and dead-inside lobbyists, and dying a little inside myself every time I saw my work “edited”—turned into shameful garbage—before going on air.
Like any other reporter, I pitched stories at morning meetings and then did the legwork to put them together, in the process learning the job. While my gut impulse at first was to righteously confront the powerful with strident questions highlighting their logical inconsistencies and factual errors, I soon found it was often smarter to affect an earnest demeanor just a hair shy of sarcastic. You need to let the person being interviewed explain why he is terrible, which is more easily done when he thinks you are stupid or on his side.
A lot of the time I feel like I overshare on the internet but when I go back to stalk myself, I realize I don’t even say the half of it which means I repress my feelings more than I think which is like…really detrimental to my mental health
I need to talk to someone about things before I diagnose myself with every personality disorder I read about on the internet.
whenever someone tells me ‘ur not like other girls” I silently cackle as I recall the time anna and I were talking to sum dude who was losing his shit as we revealed that we do normal human stuff and shit bricks when we said we’d jump into the charles and he just couldn’t get over it and was like losing his shit as we were walking to do it